before you lose it

The Art of Letting Go

Learn to let go of control, before you lose it.

If you don’t, the consequences and long lasting damage to those around you will be far greater.

Everyone must learn to accept and come to terms with the fact that some things in life are out of their control and aren’t worth worrying about. Be it as close as five minutes away, worrying whether the train will be on time today, or be it 50 years down the road and worrying about whether you will have a stable job and a family or even to a much larger extent, your own physical health and even life itself. If you try and control every aspect of life, you will eventually lose control when you least expect it and you will be far worse off than if you had learnt to let go of trying to control the things that are very much outside of your control.

This brings me to my first and most vital point, you must realise that conflict and complications are inevitably always going to arise, whether you like it or not. Relationships, partnerships, job interviews, meetings and whatever else it may be will unavoidably bring with it many complications and disputes. This could be due to opposing views, forgetting to complete a task by the set date or forgetting to set your alarm in the morning. Boiled down, these things are all made worse due to the lack of preparation and knowledge of how to solve the issue at hand.

I am currently reading a book every day titled ‘The Daily Stoic’ by Ryan Holiday. This book contains 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living. One for each day of the year. November 22nd’s entry is titled ‘The Glass is Already Broken’. It speaks of a Zen master who owned a beautifully prized cup, he repeated to himself, “The glass is already broken”. One day, the glass broke, and he said to himself, “Of course”. Because he had already come to terms with the glass braking, when it finally did, it had less of an impact on the mans life.

This can just as easily be transferred into our lives. If we realise that materialistic goods are finite, then we will have less of an attachment when they are lost, broken or stolen. If we realise that with every job interview or freelance gig that you take, the chances are high that something will go wrong, then we can be well prepared for that occurrence and it wont take us by surprise. We then learn how to deal with problems more systematically and not frantically, in many instances, during stressful times we cannot afford to be stressed as we will not produce or best work, in whatever field it may be. We need to keep our cool.

Trying to control everything is like trying to control the ocean. In the words of Dan Mace, it creates pandemonium. We don’t try to control it or tame the beast. But rather, flow with it. If you try to control the ocean, you’ll get nowhere, just like trying to swim against a rip. Let go of this concept of complete control and expect the unexpected.

The term control freak describes an individual who attempts to undermine other people based on how they perceive that everything should be done. Don’t be one of those people. They will inevitably lose control of everything.

Learn to let go of control, before you lose it.